February 2012
10 posts
3 tags
"It's a Man's Man's Man's World"
James Brown once wailed, “This is a man’s world, this is a man’s world/But it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl.” And I’d have to agree with him. This is still, sadly, a man’s world – despite all of the strides women have made in my mere 23 years on this earth. However, I might disagree that – at this point – people truly realize that the world would be...
January 2012
12 posts
3 tags
"Who knew that strippers could play baseball?"
The Bachelor is like an STD. In the case of STDs, you’re terribly afraid of catching one and very, very upset if you do - but you just like sex so much that you’re willing to put yourself in harms way. Likewise, I know I shouldn’t be watching The Bachelor, I know it’s not good for me, I know I’ll get sucked in by the Maury-like drama, I know I’ll regret...
3 tags
Is this the Saddest Thing in the World?
As a child living in a suburban gated community, I was surrounded by “soccer moms.” I hate that term, as many of these women’s children didn’t even play soccer, but it is what it is. I would have to lump my mother into that category because - even though she worked part-time from home - her life largely revolved around mine. She was an extremely hands-on parent - in a...
2 tags
I Would Have Been an Ideal Bachelor Contestant at...
Ask anyone who knows me and they’ll confirm it - I’m a little “boy crazy.” Not so much in the sense that I’m always going out and hooking up with guys, commenting on whether or not guys are attractive, or eye-fucking dudes at the bar or on the street. Rather, I always find myself having a serious crush, or a boyfriend, or a friend with benefits that I’m trying...
3 tags
"I almost just want to rip her head off and...
Each week, despite my one-time disdain for and disgust over InterventionThe Bachelor, I find myself watching the show and live-tweeting my reactions. As such, I thought it was high time to provide a recap of one of these crazy episodes. I’m not sure I can bear to make this a weekly blog entry, but last night’s episode was just so out of control that this needed to happen. It’s...
The Social Awkwardness Continues
Yesterday, I received a text that read “stole your doughnut date idea.” To explain this, we have to rewind a few weeks.
When the Yale Nerd (from “Synesthesia, and Other First Date Nonsense”) and I were first talking about getting together, I proposed that we check out the Doughnut Plant in Chelsea. I love doughnuts and thought this would be the perfect way to hang out...
Childhood Diaries
This morning, while looking for a charger for the phone I used before finally getting an iPhone 3GS in 2009, I found all of my childhood diaries (let me just be real for a second, I was only searching for the charger so I could torture myself by looking at look at old text messages sent to me by someone very important at the point in time when he was becoming very important). Before I moved to...
Déjà Vu
A few months ago, I wrote a post titled “I Think We Have Too Many Street Fairs,” in which I commented on the absurdity of having so many obnoxious, cheesy fairs around the city that only serve to block traffic, create a good deal of noise, and perpetuate the sale of ambiguously new socks. In that post though, I mentioned my amusement at a man who also happened to be walking through a...
4 tags
Synesthesia, and Other First Date Nonsense
Though I have never been single for longer than three or four months, I’ve been on surprisingly few “first dates.” Sure, in the most nominal sense, I’ve had a first date with every person I’ve ever been in any type of relationship with that spans beyond a hook-up. However, when I say “first date,” I’m really referring to the first time you ever...
1 tag
I Have Lots of Things to Say
Are you in New York City? Are you planning on being in New York City? Do you want to be in New York City? If you answered “yes” to any of those questions, you should hop on over to my Yelp page and see where you should be going and what you should be doing (or, where and what you should be avoiding at all costs). A few people think I’m funny, cool, and/or useful - maybe you...
"Don't bash me over the head for this - but you're...
It was recently brought to my attention that I’m a little sassy, and that some people take offense to this. Of couse, my sassiness (some might say bitchiness, or worse) is something I’m very aware of, and I do recognize that it can be problematic at times. In many situations though, it’s a good thing - it can make people laugh, it can provide me with good material for my blog,...
4 tags
Ten Things That Defined My Night
1. Heineken Light
2. “I could drink a cigarette faster than I could drink a beer.”
3. “He’s probably gay. He’s probably given a handjob and thought that was OK.”
4. Crew neck t-shirts with blazers
5. People from Queens
6. People with enough free time to own dogs
7. Terrible pick-up lines: “I’m not ready to get married, but if you have the ring...
